


Who You're Supposed To Be

by AssassinOfRome



Category: Legally Blonde - All Media Types, Legally Blonde - Hach/O'Keefe/Benjamin
Genre: Character Study, F/M, Jewish Character, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, chubby character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-29
Updated: 2019-03-29
Packaged: 2019-12-26 07:15:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18278399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AssassinOfRome/pseuds/AssassinOfRome
Summary: Assorted headcanons about Emmett Forrest being trans





	Who You're Supposed To Be

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, this is a little list of trans headcanons for Emmett Forrest. I'm pretty new to researching trans and Jewish characters, so if anything here is incorrect or harmful, please don't hesitate to let me know, and I'll amend it as necessary! 
> 
> There's no so much a story here as a bunch of ideas, but if any spark your fancy, leave a comment below and I'll see if I can work them into a full fic! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy and have an awesome day! :D

• Emmett knew he was different from the other kids in his class, but didn’t realise he was trans until he was about 10/11. Initially, the idea terrified him; all the male role models in his life had been scumbags or wastes of space, and he didn’t want to be anything like them. He buried himself in his work to keep from thinking about it, and as he researched more and more, he found himself being drawn to trans and LGBT topics. The idea of it became less scary, and he started dressing differently. What little pocket money he was given was saved up for buying more masculine clothing that made him feel like his true self. His mom, busy with night school and work, didn’t question it. 

• Emmett comes out to his mom about being trans a few weeks before applying to Harvard: he wants college to be a fresh start, and to allow him to start living at the person he has wanted to be for years. He’s ridiculously nervous, but his mom assures him that she will love him no matter what. The revelation isn’t quite what Emmett’s mom was expecting – she was expecting Emmett to come out as gay rather than trans – but she shows him just as much love and acceptance as she would have done otherwise. 

• Her only sadness is that Emmett had been keeping this inside for so long, and she apologises for any influence she or her boyfriends have had in forcing him to stay closeted. That apology is what sends Emmett over the edge, and both he and his mom have a good cry. 

• Emmett’s mom has a massive influence over helping Emmett choose his new name: he values her opinion, and it helps them feel close. Emmett was originally named after a relative, but no male names in his family appeal. Instead, he chooses Emmett as a variation of his dead name, and it still allows his mom to call him “Em”, her chosen nickname since his birth. 

• “Emmett” also has a range of meanings for Emmett himself. He takes strength from the fact that it links to the Hebrew word for truth, something he strives for constantly. He also likes its Germanic links to the word “universal”; as an advocate for equal rights, he likes that he can represent that in his name. Additionally, as an enormous sci-fi fan, he gets no end of satisfaction about being named after Doc Brown from Back to the Future. 

• Being uncertain about his gender identity stopped Emmett having a bat/bar mitzvah at the traditional age; he wasn’t sure which one he wanted, and besides, his mom didn’t have the money for such a lavish event and he wasn’t close enough with his relatives to warrant one anyway. 

• Emmett does however choose to have a bar mitzvah at 30 – during that time, he’s reconnecting with his faith, and becoming more comfortable with his gender, and it just feels like the right time. 

• Transitioning at Harvard is difficult – not more so than Emmett expected, but it’s certainly not easy. He is frequently misgendered by students and staff alike (Callahan is particularly bad for this, often misgendering Emmett on purpose to undermine him) despite wearing a “he/him” pin most days. He learns to keep to himself and works his way to the top of the class without joining any study groups – not that he was invited to any anyway. It’s lonely, and exhausting, but it pays off when he gets Callahan’s internship and sails through the rest of law school. Eventually, he’s so successful that they have to start taking him seriously.

• As a consequence of his hard work, Emmett is the first trans editor of the Harvard Law review, and the first trans valedictorian. Later in life, he is one of the first trans professors at Harvard Law. 

• Emmett specialises in family law – he doesn’t want anyone to go through the horrors he experienced as a kid, and especially wants to make sure all kids have a safe and loving family. Trans folks (especially kids) are obviously one of his priorities; he’ll often take their cases for free, just to ensure they get decent legal representation. He also specialises in divorce and domestic abuse cases, as he wants to support people like his mom. His favourite cases by far are adoptions though; when they go well (and they often do in Emmett’s hands, because he fights damn hard to make sure no-one gets left behind) they light him up for weeks at a time. 

• Emmett doesn’t start taking hormones for his transition until after he meets Elle – they’re expensive and difficult to get hold of without insurance, and all of his money is either going to living costs (rent, food, bills) or into a savings account to buy his mom’s dream house. Instead, he binds and takes strong enough birth control to stop menstruation almost permanently. He struggles with dysphoria but hides it as much as he can, using baggy clothing as a defence mechanism. 

• Elle finds out Emmett is trans entirely by accident. He’d been intending to tell her for several months, but with law school being so busy, it never felt like the right time. They’re studying together one night and Emmett had been particularly grouchy that day. Midway through a playful argument, Emmett had stood to collect a book from a higher shelf, and Elle had noticed a bloodstain on the back of his jeans. She quickly puts the dots together and gives Emmett her (his technically) hoodie to hide the blood whilst walking him back to her room to clean up and get the necessary supplies. Emmett is mortified, and upset, but Elle reassures him that this doesn’t change anything about their friendship and that she still adores him. When he still seems nervous, she introduces him to her secret Milky Way stash, which makes him smile. 

• Emmett is exhausted by the whole ordeal and stays the night; usually, he would sleep on the floor when crashing at Elle’s place, but she won’t hear of it when he mentions how bad his cramps get. The next morning, he wakes up to find Elle sat at her desk, surrounded by bright pink documents. Apparently, Delta Nu has a wide array of resources for trans members, and Elle had stayed up all night studying them all to learn about trans life, and how to support her friend. Seeing her, bright and chipper as she researches, is the first moment Emmett realises he might be in love with her. 

• Emmett was worried that, after coming out, Elle would be less comfortable with physical affection, but if anything, she gets cuddlier. She grabs his shoulders when excited, playfully swats him during arguments, and wraps herself around him in increasingly frequent hugs. He adores them; they make him feel safe and confident and warm. If they hold for slightly longer than just friends, it’s just because Elle is such a damn good hugger, right? 

• And then she buys him the suit and good God, he feels like his heart is going to explode. Wearing clothes that fit, having her look at him as if he’s something worth seeing, feeling good about his body after so so long: it’s overwhelming. So yes, he does go in for a kiss when she wraps her arms around him; he’s not sure if it’s romantic or just exuberant, but he goes for it, because he adores the woman in front of him, and wants to let her know. When they settle into a hug, he’s a little shocked, but he doesn’t appreciate it any less. It still remains one of his happiest memories. 

• Emmett would be reluctant to admit it, but the Wyndam trial terrifies him. Not only is it his first case as co-counsel, but the eyes of the world are watching, judging. Elle grabs his hand the first time they walk into court together, and he can feel the butterflies in his stomach take flight. It’s that feeling – plus his new confidence and his complete belief that Elle is onto something – that enables him to confront Nikos about his boyfriend. Showing off his ass was a bit of a cheap move, but it worked, and he swears he saw Elle blushing when he turned back around. Serves her right for that bend and snap – he could barely keep himself from jumping up with Warner and Enid when she’d demonstrated it. 

• The next few days are a whirl – they’re riding high on Emmett and Elle’s success at court, then Callahan ruins everything, and he can feel Elle slipping through his fingers. He panics – he’s already lost so many people, but this one hurts more than anything, like he’s being stabbed over and over again. He feels his throat close up every time he thinks of her leaving, and the words don’t come out until her door is shut and she’s out of reach. He buries himself in research that night – anything to help her stay, and to keep the case going even without her. He doesn’t sleep but doesn’t drink Red Bull to stay up; his heart is already hammering, and besides it reminds him of her too much. So he’s late to court next morning and he feels like he’s running through treacle without her. And yet there she is, shining in her pink glory, and he wants to scoop her up in his arms and never let her go. 

• But they’ve got a case to win first, and he settles for whispering in her ear. They do it easily – Elle really is a genius and she’s come so far. When they win, he can hold her, he can finally hold her. Warner comes and goes, his proposal rejected before Emmett can really get worried. Elle finds him soon enough after, slipping her arm around his waist and pulling him close. They smile for the cameras, but when they look at each other, both grins get a tiny bit bigger. 

• Eventually they wind up back at Elle’s place, sprawled across her bed. They’re both too exhausted to do much more than hold hands, but it’s the most comfortable Emmett has ever felt, and when Elle eventually sits up enough to pull him into a kiss, it’s perfect. 

• After the Wyndam case, Elle and Emmett discuss what they plan to do with their share of the legal fees. Elle, not needing the money, uses her share to buy Emmett a year’s supply of hormones to help start his transition. 

• During the early stages of his transition, Emmett experiences really bad acne and gets self-conscious about it; he worries that clients won’t take him seriously if he looks like he just walked out of high school. Luckily, Elle is on hand and her expert knowledge of skin care helps soothe the problem, and the acne fades much faster than expected. 

• Emmett also gets self-conscious about his weight during his transition; he isn’t particularly overweight, but the redistribution of fat leads to him having a little tummy, which when combined with his wider hips and fuller thighs, make him look heavier than he used to. Elle thinks it’s adorable, but understands his concerns, and helps him dress in a way that makes him feel comfortable, but still shows off his body rather than hiding it. 

• Emmett’s voice takes a long time to settle when cracking. It seems to get worse when he’s nervous, which is an extra stress when trying to take on difficult court cases. Once, during a particularly gruelling trial, he loses his voice completely, and had to pass the case onto Enid while he went home to recover. Luckily, Vivienne points him to an excellent voice therapist, who helps him both lower and take care of his voice. 

• As much as Emmett loves his suits, he hates wearing ties, especially when he’s binding. He finds the combination too constricting, and so pulls his tie off whenever possible. High-stress or pressure situations are the main culprit, but it will always be the first item of clothing he removes after work. 

• Emmett is not a particularly tall guy, and as a consequence, Elle in her higher heels can often end up a few inches taller than him. When they first start dating, Elle abandons these shoes; as much as she adores them, she doesn’t want him to feel self-conscious. When he finds this out, he tells her not to worry; he’ll stand on a box – he’ll stand on a hundred boxes – if that’s what it makes to make her feel beautiful. 

• Emmett never planned to have top surgery: he viewed it as an unnecessary expense, and finds binding to help ease his dysphoria enough to function. But after repeated chest infections and increasing back pain from overbinding, as well as a sudden self-consciousness when he turns to wearing more tailored clothing, he admits that it is more of a necessity than he thought. He gets his surgery six months before he and Elle are due to get married, and though he takes longer to recover from the process than anticipated (he keeps attempting to work too early, and only worsens his condition), he is a lot more confident, and feels genuinely attractive on his wedding day. Elle makes her agreement very apparent later that night.


End file.
